Omar’s Diary Sunday 28th December 2014 – Last day of the Christmas break Retail therapy


Today, all three servants were around home for most of the day.  For the first time this Christmas they did not have a timetable to follow or be rushing off somewhere.

Lady and man servant did pop out for a while for retail therapy.  Man servant completely fails to understand how this activity can be described as a ‘therapy’.  Therapy is meant to reduce stress and recover from something traumatic.  Instead he usually comes home stressed and traumatised so how can it be regarded as therapeutic in his opinion?

I had rather hoped they were going out to get a replacement for my now broken Christmas present; the cigar shaped thing loaded with catnip.  After they left I went upstairs and to my deep disappointment there was the cigar shaped thing still sitting on the desk.  Perhaps they had lost the receipt and were just going to get a new one anyway.

Disappointment deepened when they came home without a replacement.

I sat near the table while they were all having a late breakfast when the lady servant let out a vocalisation of disgust.

‘Look! Mitzy is eating a bird!’.

Mitzy is one of the chavs that has moved in from next door.

Sure enough there was Mitzy masticating on a now dead bird eating everything including the feathers.

Quite frankly I was appalled at this type of behaviour as I do not hunt.  All my food is delivered more or less on demand by the servants.  What was even more appalling that after consuming a whole bird Mitzy then came in the house and started attacking the biscuits in her bowl.  Honestly, some felines just do not know when to stop.  Such bad manners.  The bowl of biscuits was removed from her reach.

For the rest of the day the servants stayed indoors reading books and newspapers.

Senior man servant attacks his broadsheet paper in a most disturbing way.  Just when you think he has settled on a page there is a violent rustling crackle of the pages as he turns to the next one.  This changeover happens just as I am going off to sleep and is very disturbing.  After this had happened a few times I retired to my bed.  Senior man servant has perfected the art of the afternoon doze by being able to sleep but also hold the paper as if he was wide awake and reading it.

Man servant is quite unashamed about dozing and as he falls into a slumber will drop his book or paper from his hands.  Lady servant is very polite about dozing.  She makes a short announcement, takes her glasses off, puts her book down and falls asleep on the sofa.

Oh well it is the last day of the Christmas holiday and everyone was in bed early to get ready for a very early start tomorrow morning


About alangrenville

I live in southern Britain near the fabulous New Forest. While studying for a BSc in International Studies I have developed a strong belief in 'NIBAW' or 'nothing is black and white'. Hence my favourite saying "Too often we...enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought" (John F Kennedy).
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