I have had a quiet week since last weekend. Most of my time, as usual has been spent indoors sleeping and eating as it has just been too cold to venture outside for all but the essential and necessary visits. I do miss my ensuite.
On Monday the servants were around home for the day which was nice as always. They are company I can interact with when I choose. This interaction often leads to receiving treats. Sometimes my behaviour can be quite mischievous, like attacking the fingers flashing across the keyboard but even my bad behaviour gets rewarded.
This domestic bliss lasted until Monday evening when the bags were packed and left ready for departure on Tuesday morning.
Not a word about where the servants were off to this time. Not a word.
Early on Tuesday morning, after I had been served my breakfast, they left on their travels. I heard the words ‘Oxford’, ‘Eynsham’ and ‘Witney’ mentioned as they wished me goodbye and told me to be good for the sitters they had arranged. To cope with the onset of separation anxiety I ate some biscuits and went to sleep on the servants’ bed.
That nice lady, Jill, from number twenty one came in at lunchtime and disturbed my coping strategy. I like her as she comes to the top step and sits on it talking to me while I stretch and purr on the landing. I have a particular spot for doing this which suits both our needs. It places me in reach of her so she can stroke and fuss me and it is located exactly on top of where the hot water pipes run under the floor. Absolutely perfect setting for a feline.
Jill does not have a feline or a dog but she does have snails or for my French readers ‘escargot’ which she told me about during her visit. These are not the usual garden snails. In fact they are a bit like me in that they are unique and of a different breed to the more common types. They originally came from Africa, started life as an egg the size of a polystyrene granule and so far have grown to about three or four centimetres in length.
While Jill was stroking me she told me all about giving the three snails a bath in warm water which they get at least once a week. It apparently wakes them up and makes them active. I will believe that when I am able to see it.
If my servants think they can give me a bath once a week to make me active then they can forget that idea right now.
Talking of personal hygiene. I was put through the indignity earlier today of being treated for fleas. Why would my servants do this? I am above catching this type of infestation and I know fleas would not even give me a second glance. If anyone needs treatment it must be the chavs.
One is never sure what sort of other feline they are mixing with when they go out at all hours of the day. One has to ask what dreadful mobile pestilent visitations they may come back with.
I think the servants must have some sort of problem with pestilent visitors. I see them at least once a day spraying themselves with chemicals. If this is flea spray they are using it smells more fragrant than the one they inflict on me. The senior man servant does not seem to have a problem as when he stays here I don’t think I have seen him use any sprays.
The servants were back home on Wednesday evening and life returned to normal.
Today, Saturday, the servants checked how they had done in the Daily Telegraph Fantasy Racing league they are in. Man servant was in a bit of trouble as he had not checked that there were two races. So, both servants had to make hurried selections for just one race. They both scored the lowest points in the mini league and retain their relative placing’s. Third for the lady servant and a worsening last for the man servant. Some expert he has turned out to be.
To alleviate his deepening gloom over this situation he took comfort in the fact that Arsenal did not lose today. That is because they did not play. They have a League Cup match away to Brighton and Hove Albion on Sunday. If they lose, like the other top premiership clubs like Chelsea did earlier today, I really do not know what to do about his potential depression.
Personally, I always find solace in food.