This morning I looked out of my favourite window on to a world full of sunshine and hope. Oh how such optimism can be destroyed in under two hours. My first selection at Cheltenham today, Arbre De Vie, trailed in and crossed the finish line in tenth place. Thank you to Prospective Lady Servant or House Guest for translating this horse’s name into ‘Tree of Life’. My second selection, Une De Sceaux, came second. I am betting in single units of Dreamies which the chav, uninvited feline who has taken up squatter rights in the dining room, takes as wagers as the local turf accountants only accept money not feline biscuits. It is also so unseemly for me to be seen actually entering one of those High Street gambling emporiums. Goodness knows what sort of unwashed Servant one might encounter there. Please see below in complete transparency a summary of my wagering fund account:
Opening balance 10
Each way on Arbre De Vie – 2
Win on Une De Sceaux – 1
Closing balance 7
Yes, I am fully aware that my cover picture only shows five Dreamies when it should be seven. I am afraid that Man Servant took so long to line up this picture that I ate two of my wagering fund while I was waiting. He took so long over this picture and still it looks like an informal, unconstructed and out of focus picture. Lord Lichfield with the camera my Man Servant is not.
While Man Servant and I were waiting for my two horses to run I sat with him for a quick canter through The Times. It is just not the same now it is in tabloid format as when it was a decent sized broadsheet. Man Servant usually flicks through to the centre pages to read the editorials and columnists. On the way through the pages there was an article about doves being released at weddings and funerals that have not been trained to return home and instead go wild and start establishing flocks that are not native to Britain and are possibly impacting on the established indigenous birds.
Man Servant and I were also waiting because his computer underwent an upgrade to something called Windows 10. It took so long that Man Servant was able to go out to do some shopping, no Dreamies included and then go back out again to get the car cleaned. When he returned some two hours later the upgrade was still running. Microsoft were not popular in this household as he had such good intentions of getting things done today.
The second leader article was all about the construction of the consumer price index. Apparently night clubs have been removed from the lists as people have stopped going to them as much as they used to. I am not surprised having read that young people in particular have to queue for hours in cold weather to gain entry, have to pay exorbitant prices for drinks and get deafened by the loud music. In my day when I wore a smoking jacket and velvet evening shoes with my initials monogrammed on them one simply arrived at the door, was ushered in directly and discretely to a table in an atmosphere where it was possible to enjoy both the music and a polite conversation with the other guests.
I think it all went wrong in society when The Times changed from broad sheet to tabloid and Australians took over the media.
As I have started trying to select winners this week at Cheltenham I might just as well continue so here are my selections for Thursday the 17th March 2016:
Dreamie balance brought forward 7
1410 No 4 If In Doubt 1 Dreamie to win and -1
1450 No 5 Dynast 1 Dreamie to win -1
Dreamie balance carry forward 5
This is still fun so I will keep going with my selections but once the Dreamie fund has been depleted I will stop. It is no fun running out of Dreamies.